Children Need Roots and Wings

Bluebird Houses - Children Need Roots and Wings

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"Good parents give their children Roots and Wings." --Jonas Salk

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Bluebird Houses

The first time I heard this quote, it made me think. The two sound contradictory - roots and wings: one to tie us to the ground and the other to enable us to fly away.

As I concept about it, however, I realized that, in fact, it clearly summed up the two original responsibilities we have as parents: to supply a safe, nurturing environment in which our children can grow, and to put in order them for the time when they will "leave the nest."

So how do we give our children roots and wings?

Of procedure the roots come first. We supply a safe home where our children fabricate a sense of belonging, and where they can grow and become strong.

To help our children fabricate strong roots, we can learn a few thing from gardeners. They will tell you that, when you first plant a seed, you don't see any strengthen for some time. The seeds send down their roots into the soil first, long before the tiny shoots appear above ground. So the gardener learns patience, trusting the natural process.

As parents, we need to have the same patience and trust the process.

Roots serve two purposes: they give the plant stability, by going deep and keeping it to the ground. They also supply cusine through the water and minerals that are drawn in.

Stability and nourishment. We parents supply the same things.

Stability:

Of course, by providing for their corporeal needs - a home, food, clothing - we originate the framework of stability. But there is so much more.

We also need to supply an atmosphere that is nurturing, supporting, and safe - emotionally as well as physically. In this way, we give our children a sense of belonging and security.

Nourishment:

Just as plants draw water and other nutrients from the soil to withhold their growth, our children depend on us for their nurturing. Our words of encouragement and appreciation, our guidance, and especially our love - these are the cusine they receive from us.

To supply a carport and nurturing home for your children:

Create an atmosphere that is loving and welcoming, so it feels good to be home. Communicate gently, with respect and consideration. Establish clear expectations and uncostly consequences. Treat them like valued members of the family. Encourage their creativity. Respect their ideas, even if you don't agree with them. Have fun together.
Where do wings come into this picture?

Once our children feel safe and secure, we need to put in order them for the time when they will leave that protection and to go out into the world on their own.

I remember watching fledgling bluebirds in our back yard. For several days before they finally flew from the nest, they took turns thrusting their heads out the opening of the bluebird house and flapping their wings wildly, as if they were going to fly.

I became aware that they were strengthening their wings for the day when they would finally fly. I also fantasized that they were construction up their courage.

After several days of practicing, one-by-one the birds flew from the nest.

It is not so distinct with our children. Of course, for our children, the process takes years instead of days. As they try out their wings, they can be very disruptive - so limited room in the nest for those big, flapping wings.

So how do we withhold our children as they strengthen their wings, while preserving the serenity of our home?

We must Not try to keep a fledgling from doing what comes naturally. If we do, we are interrupting a natural process and setting ourselves up for disappointment and disappointment.

How do we help our children find their wings?

Our job is to be sure that they have the skills essential to effect in the world and the self-confidence to take that giant leap out the door when their time comes.

The process of fledging starts early - long before they are ready to fly.

Success Skills:

While our children are very young, we can begin to teach them how to be responsible and to conduce to the family.

Even pre-school children can be foreseen, to put toys away and to help with household chores. This helps them to feel capable and it provides the beginning of a good work ethic. Responsibilities can growth as our children are able to cope more, but they should always be balanced with free time and opportunities for play, because children learn and grow from those as well.

Self-confidence:

This comes with practice. As we give our children responsibilities and moderately withhold them as they are learning, they will also learn to believe in themselves.

Confidence also comes from the potential to make decisions. In order to put in order our children for the outside world, we need to give them many opportunities to make their own choices. We can start with the insignificant things, such as what to wear and how to fix their hair - then moderately move to the more important decisions with real consequences.

To give your children wings:

Give them responsibilities early, and expanding with time. Help them fabricate values by your example and by setting definite limits. Give them choices early and increasingly as they are able to cope them. Give them permission to examine and make mistakes and touch the results of those choices - not as punishment, but as a way to learn what works and what doesn't. Help them find their gifts - find what they love - so they will have passion for life and a sense of purpose.

When we do our job well - when we help our children fabricate strong wings - yes, they will fly away.

But if the roots are strong enough, they will always fly back to us - not to stay, but to share with us the astounding things they are discovering and creating in their own lives.

Maybe to say "Thank you."

Maybe just to get someone else good dose of the love that helped them to be who they are.

Then we get to see that we never of course lose our children, as long as they know there is something worth arrival back to.

I hope you get new knowledge about Bluebird Houses. Where you may put to use within your evryday life. And above all, your reaction is passed about Bluebird Houses.